Bitch

Received a text message from a bitch! Asking me to stop disturbing the "husband". Well excuse me!!! I got pissed off! Wad a bitch!! Hidup kalau seorang ustazah boleh uh nasihat pasal maruah!! Nie dia sendiri tkde maruah nk nasihat org!!!

ASTARGHFIRULLAH!!!!

Dun Ever Change!

it seems dat it is difficult to even talk to you.. texting u already tense me up... sometime i just cried cause i cannot get you.. it seems u changed alot.. i just missed the way you are.. the way you text me.. you once said that you will never missed a minute to text me.. look at you now? u text me like 1 msg per hour or it can comeout to 1 msg per 2 days.. even wen i called you, you would either reject or didnt pick up my call... giving excuses that your prepaid is low or no reception!  i sometimes got too worried!! but you wouldnt understand how i felt!! my love towards you have never change from the first day i know you.. how i wish to get the old you back in my life!!! i really mean dat!!

 

till the next post den... daaaaaaa........

Need him by my side

I need him by my side.. I know he wouldnt accept me by now as he is having someone else.. I might not be long here in this world.. All i need is love from someone.. Dear, if u read this please come back to my life.. At this moment, i dun want to be alone

OMG!!

was receiving treatment for my fever n diarrhea.. i asked this question: Doctor, why is the back of my neck very hard like a stone? and it made my neck stiff sometimes.. it hurts awhile.. but it went away.. Doctor replied: let me have a look.. ouh.. its actually... TUMOUR.. by den, i was too shocked to even say anything.. he continued, u should have it remove.. or it will effect the whole body.. I said thank you and left!

i was sad! obviously no one is by my side when i received this news! now not even my family members knows about it! i dun want my aunt to know!! my grandparents will have a shocked if they know it too... 

after knowing the news, my weight actually decreased!! i didn't have mood to eat or drink! i went to work normally and do my work as usual.. but i will just get tired easily and bored!! nowadays, im having INSOMNIA!! i really cant sleep!! 

i have to get back to bed! my granny's yelling at this time!! URGH!!

till the next post den.. da!! ):

how could you?

how could you do this to me?

wanna know if im really in love with u by hurting me and said that u r married? hell no!! yes i do love you! but when u told me that ur wife is pregnant, im sorry, i have to go out from ur life! i just dun want history to repeat! had it once, i tolerate, had it twice, i remain calm, this is the 3rd! i cannot stand it anymore!!

reason for u to do this to me is to test me? u test my patience enuf! its too hurt for me to stay in the position where im hanging in the mid air!

first u told me that u are married... i accept.. i kept quiet although it hurts me.. 2nd u told me u dun have any feelings for her.. i accept it.. it hurts bt i overcomes it.. 3rd u told me ur wife is pregnant.. i told myself i had to move on.. u build that family and i dun intend to break it! i moved on! 4th wen i moved on, and found someone who is willing to love me, u confessed to me that u r not married! WTH??  this is where i dunno which is true? there is no proof!! u making me like... URGH!!!!

after all the bruises in my heart starting to cure, u again give me cuts.. this time it really tore my heart! i tak sangka u  buat i macam nie!! how could you!!

SHOULD I TAKE A BREAK? VACATION TO EASE MY TENSION?

ARGH!! i really dunno wad else to do! i dun even know who to believe!!! wad a life??

For M Darwis Daniel

It gonna sound awful! but this song is for you!

till the next post den.. da!!

u never fail to make me smile

hi all.. i was in low mood since thursday.. and got the news of Hadly accident.. he almost leave us.. bt with the prayers from family and friends, ALHAMDULILLAH he's fine now.. without this news, i wouldnt know wad is his feeling and his fantasy.. his sister, Yatee, updates me about him.. we chat and she told me abt his bother wish just before he got into the accident.. Hadly wanted to get engage.. he was fond of someone, which at first i dun know who.. after awhile, his sister told me that the person he wants to get engage was ME! i got a shocked!!! i was speechless.. i didnt realised all this while he was fond of me.. i just know him for barely three weeks.. i couldnt say anything..

he text me just one day after he woke up from his 3 days sleep.. he said he was sorry cause didnt manage to text me.. (he didnt know that i knew abt his accident and his engagement plans) i continue texting him as normal. i ask him abt the engage thingy and he said yes he want to engage.. but he said that he have not meet the girl that he want to engage with.. i just assume i dun know anything.. he den finally admit that the girl who he wants to get engage to is me.. i went... WWHHHOOOOAAA! i just didnt ask much cause i dun want to get hurt again. i just pretend this never happen.

wadever it is, im happy to lead a new relationship with Muhammad Hadly Qusyairie Bin Abu Bakar. he never fail to make me smile.. i hope this relationship goes well as we plan..

got to end here.. going to meet him later..

in the next post den... da..